Coping with Uncertainty
If you’re not used to the background anxiety and terror of not knowing what will happen in your work, social life or health, this is probably a super scary awful time of stress and ickyness. Lucky for you, this has been my reality for the past few years (weird flex I know) so I have developed some coping strategies that help get me through, and hopefully they can help you too (yes dark and sometimes inappropriate humour is one of them, how did you guess?) So welcome to the club, sorry you’re here but since you are, let’s deal with this shit together!
I have no idea what is going to happen and I can’t plan anything! Argh!
No, you don’t and no you can’t. So please, for yourself and others, stop trying.
It is super scary, but if your energy is all taken up with trying to plan for situations A-Z, and anything in
advance, all that will happen is that you will burn out. I know it’s really horrible, but the current situation
is very much out of our sparklingly clean hands. Plan for today, tomorrow, the next few days, maybe
the next week if you’re feeling really confident! But have faith that you will be able to adapt and handle
whatever comes next and concentrate on what you can do now.
It is super scary, but if your energy is all taken up with trying to plan for situations A-Z, and anything in
advance, all that will happen is that you will burn out. I know it’s really horrible, but the current situation
is very much out of our sparklingly clean hands. Plan for today, tomorrow, the next few days, maybe
the next week if you’re feeling really confident! But have faith that you will be able to adapt and handle
whatever comes next and concentrate on what you can do now.
I feel restless and bored and exhausted and overwhelmed….
Yes, to all the feelings. Being stuck in makes you simultaneously have too much and not enough energy
to cope, because you are probably having peaks of anxious energy and then crashing and wanting to
sleep forever. This is when basic self care needs to kick in, where you prioritise the things you need to
do and leave the things you don’t need to do until another time. Basic self care is eating, drinking,
washing, sleeping and love! Sounds cheesy, that last one? It’s not, it's actually super important, our
relationships with ourselves and others are what help us navigate life and replenish our emotional energy. However, relationships can also have the opposite effect if they are not working. Do your best to be kind to yourself and others, reduce contact with emotional vampires and maintain your boundaries. Let yourself have a nap if you need to! If you are still working, try to make the time you are not working more relaxing and take the pressure off yourself. Many of us feel like we need to be productive over-achievers all the time, and we don’t, especially not now. Try to get comfortable with taking the path of least resistance and remember that the best you can manage now is good enough.
to cope, because you are probably having peaks of anxious energy and then crashing and wanting to
sleep forever. This is when basic self care needs to kick in, where you prioritise the things you need to
do and leave the things you don’t need to do until another time. Basic self care is eating, drinking,
washing, sleeping and love! Sounds cheesy, that last one? It’s not, it's actually super important, our
relationships with ourselves and others are what help us navigate life and replenish our emotional energy. However, relationships can also have the opposite effect if they are not working. Do your best to be kind to yourself and others, reduce contact with emotional vampires and maintain your boundaries. Let yourself have a nap if you need to! If you are still working, try to make the time you are not working more relaxing and take the pressure off yourself. Many of us feel like we need to be productive over-achievers all the time, and we don’t, especially not now. Try to get comfortable with taking the path of least resistance and remember that the best you can manage now is good enough.
How do I organise life working from home/being stuck at home?
Routines are reassuring, and in these situations, sticking to them as best you can is a good way to
maintain a semblance of normalcy. It will also make it easier to adjust back when things do eventually
go back to ‘normal’ (and they will, for the most part.) So do your best to get up at the same time and do
the things you would normally do, when you would normally do them. (This is also why shift work is
such a bellend but that’s a rant for another time….) If you slip up, don’t dwell on it, just try to get back
into your routine when you can. If you don’t actively decide on a routine, the weird thing is that you’ll
probably end up in one anyway, but you just won’t be happy about it! Like after a week you might realise
you have started always going to bed a couple of hours later and waking up a couple of hours later,
even if you didn’t intend to! Humans are strange creatures like that, so use it to your benefit.
maintain a semblance of normalcy. It will also make it easier to adjust back when things do eventually
go back to ‘normal’ (and they will, for the most part.) So do your best to get up at the same time and do
the things you would normally do, when you would normally do them. (This is also why shift work is
such a bellend but that’s a rant for another time….) If you slip up, don’t dwell on it, just try to get back
into your routine when you can. If you don’t actively decide on a routine, the weird thing is that you’ll
probably end up in one anyway, but you just won’t be happy about it! Like after a week you might realise
you have started always going to bed a couple of hours later and waking up a couple of hours later,
even if you didn’t intend to! Humans are strange creatures like that, so use it to your benefit.
I’m worrying all the time and I’m fed up of the news but I want to stay informed
Check the news once or twice a day at key times when you know a useful update is likely to be given,
like first thing in the morning or in the evening. Then stop looking at it and do something else. When you
are not working or doing housekeeping, try to do or watch something that makes you feel good.
Laughter, though not the best medicine, is genuinely good for you. We need to have moments of levity
even in disturbing times, and you’ll find that even in the most dark situations people will still find humour,
because it gives us a break from the mental stress of a difficult situation. This is what helps us stay
resilient and conserve energy for when we need it. There are times and jokes which are not appropriate,
and this will feel different for everyone. But what you need is distraction, so watch or do something
completely unrelated; re-runs of favourite sitcoms or stand up routines, silly panel shows, funny podcasts,
playing games, doing something arty or crafty, dancing to your favourite music, reading your favourite
books…. Give yourself space to live in the moment and you will be able to cope better when you need
to face any difficulties that come up. It’s not disrespectful to laugh and find joy, it’s a coping strategy, and
something you are not just allowed but need to have to keep going.
like first thing in the morning or in the evening. Then stop looking at it and do something else. When you
are not working or doing housekeeping, try to do or watch something that makes you feel good.
Laughter, though not the best medicine, is genuinely good for you. We need to have moments of levity
even in disturbing times, and you’ll find that even in the most dark situations people will still find humour,
because it gives us a break from the mental stress of a difficult situation. This is what helps us stay
resilient and conserve energy for when we need it. There are times and jokes which are not appropriate,
and this will feel different for everyone. But what you need is distraction, so watch or do something
completely unrelated; re-runs of favourite sitcoms or stand up routines, silly panel shows, funny podcasts,
playing games, doing something arty or crafty, dancing to your favourite music, reading your favourite
books…. Give yourself space to live in the moment and you will be able to cope better when you need
to face any difficulties that come up. It’s not disrespectful to laugh and find joy, it’s a coping strategy, and
something you are not just allowed but need to have to keep going.
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